Weight(y) Insanity !!!

In a nation of sincere chicks obssessed with size zero, it took me quite a while to take the plunge myself.

I wouldn't call myself a fitness freak but yes, I do love to take care of how I look. A lil' weighty issues here 'n' there motivated me to join a fitness centre. A diet chart, a diet diary, weighing myself daily (with fingers crossed), drinking myself crazy (water, dumbo), an hour of jogging/brisk walking and an exercise regime that I do not know if I will be able to follow for long, I would like to call myself obsessed!!!

A fascination with being thin is a defining part of this rapidly fattening age and nothing exemplifies it better than the recent tumult in fashion and the media over the size zero physique.

I have always been told that natural is beautiful. I used to agree with this.....but not anymore. Though I still do not advocate size zero, I do not mind confessing that my preoccupation with my body is driving me crazy.

There's another friend of mine who also happens to share my feelings. An increase of about 2kgs on the weighing scale left her depressed. She was sad and sulking and kept a sullen face throughout. It was in her that I saw my fixation with my non troubling weight. What happened to her and me, happens to everyone arounds us. Delusion of perfection!!!

One minute debating whether to have a Belgian dark chocolate ice-cream or a sprout salad, two minutes chastising yourself for choosing the ice-cream; two minutes contemplating how fattening the sugar and chocolate was!!!

The trouble is once you get into the mode of weight loss and take steps towards lower sizes, you just can't get back. Binging and normal eating habits start seeming like a distant thing. What you eat determines the way people look at you. I would love to get back to my normal food habits but I just can't get myself to do that. From counting calories to drinking 4 litres of water everyday, from working out for 1.5 hours daily to brisk walking for 1 hour, from controlling all the urges to indulge in that one scoop of Hazelnut Crunch to eating salads and 'healthy' food, the weight loss fetish doesnt seem to ward itself off.

The pursuit of thinness is a way of channelling every emotional energy into one ambition; it is a way of losing yourself in one problem - weight loss - and ignoring all the other issues in your life. Almost all women want to be thinner. When a woman feels low, or challenged by life, sometimes any excess flesh feels literally like the embodiment of their perceived weakness. Control around food is seen as a sign of intelligence and restraint. It’s a seductive and all-consuming addiction when the figures on the scales are a simple, if nutty, method of measuring your success as a human being.

As someone once said, the best way to lose weight is to eat all you want of everything you don't like!!!

(P.S.: Don't go out of your weigh to please anyone but yourself!!!)